Happy New Year!

Welcome to 2025—the year we work, folks. We’re hustling, we’re booking, we’re creating art. Doesn’t that sound dreamy? Living the life, no more bartending till three a.m. and driving home like the crypt keeper. No more questionable comments from red-faced regulars making me rethink my “flexible job” choice.

With the new year upon us, it’s time for a little reflection—a year of auditions, callbacks, and roles I wanted so bad. Alexandra tells me this is “good data.” Sure, let’s call it that, instead of my hopes and dreams crushed into a bitter shot of “meh” stats. But hey, it’s all part of the grind, right? Every number is a stepping stone, or so they say.

In the past three hundred sixty-five days, I’ve received forty-four auditions all from my agent, Susan, I opened forty-four emails, each a tiny flicker of hope, forty-four chances to shift my career, and forty-four new characters to meet. I promise I am grateful for every single one no matter the outcome!

Out of those, twenty-eight were commercial auditions, most of them from Charlotte. Were they thrilling? Not exactly. But hey, work is work. Commercials might not get my pulse racing like film or TV, but they’re still a win. After all, Flo from Progressive turned it into a whole career. Commercials are designed for the channel-flipping crowd, so the roles are usually not exactly Shakespearean. But, I’m here for it, one audition at a time. Oh, and in case you’re wondering—didn’t book a single one. Your loss, Home Depot!

I had fourteen TV auditions, mostly for shows filming in Wilmington. The Summer I Turned Pretty and Outer Banks have seen my face a few times. I haven’t landed the right role yet, but the fun’s in the trying. Whether it’s a one-liner like, “Oh no! Someone help him!” or a potential recurring character, every audition is a new adventure.

The one worry with auditioning for these shows is that if I land a tiny role, it might lock me out of future, juicier roles on the same show. If it’s just the first season, who’s to say there aren’t three more seasons to come with tons of roles to now miss out on? I want any role. I want the tiny role, but if I don’t book it, maybe it’s because there’s a bigger opportunity waiting. The thrill of possibility~

I had a grand total of two film auditions. (Sigh) Yep, you read that right. It’s not the norm, but this year was heavy on TV in Wilmington. The few films that did roll in had barely any auditions for me. Still, I did get two, and they were memorable.

First up, Claimed by the CEO. I couldn’t find much about it online (yes, I Googled obsessively). From what I gathered, it’s a dramatic, campy romance, and my character was in a wild love triangle/kidnapping scenario. Cringe? Absolutely. Fun? You bet.

Then, there was the werewolf movie. Scene opens mid-transformation and also pregnant ?? I had to convulse and scream “WHYYY PLEASE GOD NO” while also being more characteristically …wolf-ish. It was a stretch, but hey, turning into a werewolf isn’t easy—just ask Teen Wolf. It pushed me outside of my comfort zone for sure and made me really think about what each part of my body was doing. How does one figure out what their body does during a wolf transformation? Let me know if you figure it out or know a werewolf personally.

Out of all these auditions, I was sent to producers seven times, had two Zoom callbacks for commercials, and landed... drumroll... one. Yep, one special, loved, close to my heart booking. Not counting local gigs with friends that don’t have much money associated with them —this was a big role on a big network. I’m proud of that one win, and I’ll spill all the details in a future post. (;

Overall, I’m content with my audition haul. Each one pushed me to grow, make bold choices, and ask, “Who am I? What do I want? Why am I here?”. I had so much fun doing it and that’s what we need to remember. This is a fun job and when you stop playing you stop really being present. I’m still trying by best to play and for this, I am thankful. And so, as we step into 2025, I ask one final question:

Who will I be this year?

Laina

Is the audition worth it? Also I was born to be a pimple

I’ve auditioned hundreds of times for commercials, day players, series regulars, industrials—you name it. But there’s something uniquely grueling about the low-paying, no-credit, local hire roles. I’m grateful for every audition, truly—so lucky to have constant material to work with, even if it’s the same North Carolina Education Lottery spot I’ve auditioned for thirteen times and never gotten a callback for. But hey, the job is the process, right? Every role takes you one step closer to bigger things—even if you're just the girl in the background, smiling at the lake in a ten-second NC travel commercial.

BUT

To me there comes a point when an audition just isn’t worth it. Sure, we love to work and tape, but we don’t love wasting time on roles we won’t get anything creatively out of, won’t get credit for, and will never actually see. You end up spending more on the gig than you make. They want you there the day before for a fitting, and you're only getting $40. LOL. Now you're paying for two nights in a hotel, gas to get there, and missing work—the job you actually need at the moment to pay the bills. You might make $500 for the day, and if the residual buyout is good, great. But if you don’t even get that, whats the point? Why would I drive four hours, miss work, and spend as much on travel and housing as I make on the shoot?

Being honest about your “local hire” situation is key. It never looks good to just decline if they don’t cover housing and travel, especially when you’ve said you can be a local hire in Charlotte. You meant, "Yeah, I can be a local hire for an awesome show, getting credits, screen time, and a real artistic experience!" Not so much for a non-speaking industrial where you just smile at the camera and say, “Welcome!” Some things just aren’t worth it.

Okay, but everyone’s in a different spot. If that’s something you’re into and it’s worth it to you, then do your thing and get your bag. If you can book those gigs and love doing them, you can work A LOT. But what I’m figuring out is that I don’t love commercials. They can feel forced and phony. My friend Gray (shoutout) is AMAZING at them. He can take any campy, cringe-worthy commercial script and make it fun and not awkward. I have no idea how he does it, but he's SPECIAL and enjoys that type of material.

Moral of the story? Be more like Gray.

The featured picture is me as a pimple during a commercial audition for Mighty Patch, where they made me audition FOUR times as a pimple (yes, even got popped in one scene). I didn’t land the role, so now all I have to show for it is this glorious pimple still.

You’re welcome for this. ugh

The child selling hotdogs in The Wizard of Oz is speaking

I’ve done the unthinkable. After years of going back and forth between sharing my journey or going at it alone, I’ve turned thirty and decided: Fuck it. Nothing about being a poor, striving actress is easy. In fact, it’s a solid 1/10—would not recommend to a regular human. This business is full of rejection and hearing the word “no.” It’s easy to feel like you’re not good enough or that you aren’t meant to be doing this.

But I’m here to tell you: you’re meant to do it.

If you wake up in the morning thinking about acting, if you watch a film and are blown away by the subtle facial movements, the vocal choices, and the magic happening behind the camera, you’re meant for this. I personally can’t think of anything else I’d rather do. Acting is the love of my life. Besides my wonderful partner, Will, it’s the most important thing in my world.

I’ve been obsessed with acting since I was little. Born on August 8th (yes, a Leo—how shocking), I started doing plays in elementary school. I was so bad that they created a part for me in The Wizard of Oz just so I could participate. When I got to high school, I joined the theatre program, and, again, I was… not great. I auditioned for the community production of Beauty and the Beast with an overly sexual rendition of “Roxie” from Chicago.“The name on everybody’s lips is gonna be…”
Not me.

I didn’t even land a background role.

But something changed during my junior year. I don’t know what sparked it, but we had auditions for Steel Magnolias, and I went for M’Lynn. I felt something so deeply during that (admittedly overdone) monologue. By the end, I was sobbing:

I could jog all the way to Texas and back, but my daughter can’t! She never could!

Oh, Sally Field, how we love you.

I got the role—and every lead role after that.

After graduating, I moved to Wilmington because of the film industry here. One year later, the entire industry moved to Atlanta, where I had just left. Fast forward ten years: I have an agent, I’m SAG-eligible, and I’m still the same 15-year-old belting “Roxie” at a Beauty and the Beast audition.

With this blog, I’m going to share updates on my auditions (with video proof of the atrocities). I’ll share tips on at-home audition setups, techniques, acting books, colleges, and the actors I’m currently obsessed with. I hope you enjoy this journey with me—and that I crush it, just like North Gwinnett High School’s 2009 Steel Magnolias performance!

just let me have that one okay?

Laina